5 kick-ass ways to rediscover YOU busy mama

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You’re a busy mama… but you’re still you

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As busy mamas, wives, daughters, co-workers our routine often revolves around everyone but us. And it’s so important to remember that even though we’re mamas… we’re still US. Taking time out for ourselves helps us to come back into our families and work-places as the best version of ourselves. We deserve it. We need it. So here’s 5 kick-ass ways to rediscover the YOU after kids.

#1 Be proud

When was the last time you asked yourself – what do I want to be?

Hold up now, I get it, you’re a busy mama, perhaps a wife, a daughter, sister and colleague too. But what I mean is…  what are your goals? Where do you want to be in 6 months, 1 year, 2 years time? Setting yourself goals, working towards and achieving them is something to celebrate and be proud of. For YOU.

I’ll probably lose some followers writing this – but it’s important to me to be authentic – being a Mama is a vital and beautiful and challenging part of who I am BUT it doesn’t solely define me. I am more than the sum of my parental parts. I love being a purpose-driven solopreneur, a creator, a coach, sharing my lessons to help others. (And no, the irony that I wouldn’t have learned those lessons if I hadn’t become a busy mama myself is not lost on me!)

I set myself goals every year using the system I teach in my Happiness Habits Routine eCourse where my biggest, hairiest, scariest dreams are broken down into mangeable monthly, weekly and daily tasks. And NOW is the perfect time to do this. So grab yourself a pretty planner or notebook and get scribbling.

Here’s some questions to start you off:

What are you going to achieve next year that even just the thought of it makes your heart sing?

What (or who) do you need in order to make that dream a reality?

What are the ways that you could get those things you need?

When are you going to get them done by?

Can you find an acountability partner… a person to cheelead you, supports you, challenge you? (Can you be an accountability partner for someone too?)

#2 Be as healthy as you can

It’s so easy when we’re busy being mamas to focus on everyone else and neglect ourselves. Hoovering up left-overs at the sink, driving everywhere and not moving our bodies, going to bed at midnight just so we get some time to ourselves once the little people are finally asleep.

So easy to do. But how does it make us feel? Lousy, right?

Eating healthily, exercising regularly and getting enough sleep is easy to say, I know, but it really does help us to show up as the best version of ourselves every day. Sure, it’s not going to work all the time, but it’s something to aim for.

Perhaps get started by picking just one healthy habit and setting yourself a goal of achieving it today. Not forever more, not every day this week, not even tomorrow. Just TODAY. If you achieve it, celebrate the HECK out of that! Then tomorrow set yourself the goal again. One stop forward, one day at a time.

Tip: Here’s a 30 sec busy mama tip that stops me from hoovering up leftovers:

Watch more 30 sec busy mama tip videos

#3 Be you

Think back to a time before the kids came along – I call this ‘me – BC’. What did you love to do? Alone or with your partner of friends? What made you smile, gave you that happy-tummy feeling (you know what I mean, right?). When was the last time you did one of those things?

Often when we become Busy Mamas that ‘me – BC’ gets put on a shelf, waiting for the time to be right to bring her back down. But when is the right time? When our babies are toddlers? When our toddlers go to school? when they go to college or leave home? When we’re too old to enjoy it?

Life isn’t a rehearsal, my friends…

See if you can schedule in time for some of your ‘me – BC’ passions – whether that’s writing, cinema, sport, shopping, long walks, reading, art, nights out with friends, theatre or something else. Book a babysitter, call in a favour, offer to trade evenings with a friend you trust. Put it on your calendar and start looking forward to it.

How good does that feel?

#4 Be kind to yourself

What’s the one Busy Mama accessory we could all do without? The guilt. Guilt about not playing enough, not cooking enough healthy food for our kids, them not sleeping enough or not eating enough (or too much), guilt about nights out or time on our own.

Enough already!

Be kind to yourself and ditch the guilt. You’re doing the best you can (we all are) and if our kids are healthy and happy then that’s good enough. We need to ditch the perception of parenting perfection and cut ourselves a break.

Here’s some more fab posts on ditching perfection from Vicki Psarias, Ceri Gillett, Lizzie Roles and the amazing Katie Kirby has even written a book about it – Hurrah for gin: a book for perfectly imperfect parents.

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#5 Be selfish

When’s the last time you created some time in the day just for you? No, I don’t mean sneaking off to the look for 5 minutes peace (although that’s totally a thing, seriously). I mean consciously creating time that’s wholly and truly for you, JUST YOU.

Creating me-time is SO important. So much of our routine as busy mamas revolves around everyone BUT us, but we NEED that solo-mio time – to reconnect with ourselves, to decompress, to de-stress, to focus on something else so that we can re-emerge as the best version of our mama-selves.

And you know what? if that means being selfish for 30 mins a day or more then I say FINE. you deserve it. You need it. Take it.

When I wanted to chisel out my own me-time I realised I had to change my routine. I had to consciouly build that time into my day. As part of my recovery from post natal depression (you can read more about that here, but it’s a long one so pack extra biscuits) I developed 8 Happines Habits that I used to craft my new routine. A routine that gave me back time for me, that kick-started my positivity every day and ended my evenings with grace, gratitude and a feeling of achievement.

I share exactly how I created this routine, and how you can too, in my 8 week course The Happiness Habits Routine™. There are handouts, worksheets, videos, and a private Facebook group for support where amazing busy mamas are already crushing their goals and encouraging each other every day. I’d love you to join us.

“I’m working my way through the Happiness Habits routine from Michelle Reeves Coaching and my one year goal is to become a morning person! So far I’ve made it to the gym 4 times at 6.30am, this is a miracle and if you know me you will know just how much! Proof to me that with a bit of encouragement from others we can change our habits and make our lives work better for ourselves and others. I’m feeling the benefits of productivity and energy already! Whooop!” – Lizzie Roles, LizzieSomerset.com